Why do we struggle to advocate for ourselves?

Everything you need to change any aspect of your life and make it stick
Everything you need to change any aspect of your life and make it stick
Why do we struggle to advocate for ourselves?
If life was a race, is your current approach to worry, regret, and self-doubt handicapping your ability to move forward?
As we approach the beginning of this holiday season, I can’t help but think about families. Whether they are family by choice or family by default, we all have groups of people in our lives that we love and are thankful for yet, despite all that, these people that know us best also know how to best push our buttons. How can we better connect with these humans that sometimes make it difficult to be kind?
I don’t believe I’ve ever had a session or worked with a client that was not seemingly persecuted by Father Time. Many of us believe that we don’t have enough time, that we’re running out of time, or that there is simply too much to do. How much of this is fixable? In a recent session I had with a friend, I was surprised at the answer to that question.
Nearly every client I work with has a hard time disconnecting from work. Why is disconnection so hard?
When I was in private practice, I had a client that called me all the time. Constantly. How I showed up in the relationship changed everything about how I set boundaries in my relationships, personally and professionally.
Most of the attorneys that I work with do not believe that it is possible for them to create happiness within their current environment. They come to me unhappy and overworked. They believe that the only way things are going to get better is if the firm finally changes. Or if they leave. Part of the work that I do with my clients is helping them to start setting boundaries and flexing their “no” muscle. Today we explore why this so hard and why we MUST change.
For many of us, when we are practicing and things get hairy, we unknowingly slip into survival mode and our days are spent living in fight or flight. We lose touch with our rational thinking and have a hard time seeing the forest for the trees. We are convinced that there are no solutions available to us and we just want to keep our heads above water. How to dig out of overwhelm and make better choices.
Many of my clients embrace perfectionism in one way or another. Outwardly, they appear successful and confident but their inner dialogues are filled with self-judgments and whole host of “shoulds” — things they should have done better, perfectly. As we unpack those patterns of negative self-talk and begin redirecting our brains to more worthy thoughts, it opens up yet another opportunity for self-judgment. How can we leverage failures to overcome our perfectionist tendencies?
As the demands of the day press down upon us with such herculean force, it can be difficult to maintain composure and prevent the overwhelm meltdown. Today, I share a story about how I leveraged my calendar and my priorities to stop the overwhelm meltdown.